In general, I think university has become so over-hyped that when people get there it can’t help but be different to expectations.
Often , uni is described as the “best time of your life”- and for many people it is .
For many, it’s a time where you get to meet lots of new people , have endless fun and drunken antics with flatmates, and when you get to pursue a degree or career you love , and have endless freedom.
But this ignores how there is also an increasing proportion of people who do not get to enjoy this university experience.
People which academic pressure, isolation, homesickness, depression and suicide all affect every year in the thousands…
Often , uni is described as the “best time of your life”- and for many people it is .
For many, it’s a time where you get to meet lots of new people , have endless fun and drunken antics with flatmates, and when you get to pursue a degree or career you love , and have endless freedom.
But this ignores how there is also an increasing proportion of people who do not get to enjoy this university experience.
People which academic pressure, isolation, homesickness, depression and suicide all affect every year in the thousands…
These people are part of “the dark side of university” – a side that often goes unspoken about.
That was until recently – in programs such as the BBC’s Death on campus: our story.
This was a 30 minute program exploring the events that led up to 3 students at university taking their own lives. The program reminded viewers of the shocking statistics that 134 students took their own life in 2015- which is a number that has nearly doubled in 8 years- and is still increasing.
That was until recently – in programs such as the BBC’s Death on campus: our story.
This was a 30 minute program exploring the events that led up to 3 students at university taking their own lives. The program reminded viewers of the shocking statistics that 134 students took their own life in 2015- which is a number that has nearly doubled in 8 years- and is still increasing.
Just to think that what was sold to you as some of the best years of your life , as a fresh start, could go so tragically wrong is completely distressing.
Yet the thing is ....
when you’ve been to university yourself and dealt with trying to keep up with work -possibly a job too- and caring for yourself -all whilst missing your family and friends- it can scarily becomes more understanding people get themselves into such dark places mentally.
I , as well as my friends and family have gotten themselves into such a dark place at university where with more time we could have been one of the 3 on the program - and it genuinely terrifies me.
when you’ve been to university yourself and dealt with trying to keep up with work -possibly a job too- and caring for yourself -all whilst missing your family and friends- it can scarily becomes more understanding people get themselves into such dark places mentally.
I , as well as my friends and family have gotten themselves into such a dark place at university where with more time we could have been one of the 3 on the program - and it genuinely terrifies me.
So I just wanted to take this opportunity to remind everyone I know that if something is ever making you so unhappy or stressed that you feel trapped and want to kill yourself. Then you need to leave.
It sounds easy to say , and from I know from experience it's difficult to do - but there will be better days once you've freed yourself.And I don't know any parent who wouldn't rather have their child alive and safe -then have them take their own life at a university far away from them.
There is honestly no amount of maintenance loan or tuition fee debt that is worth someone stressing so much that they feel like their only option is taking their own life.
There are ALWAYS better ways ; every issue , no matter how big it may feel at the time , can always be broken down and managed.
Moreover , it has to be said that you are not a failure or a loser for changing paths or dropping out- you will find where you are supposed to be eventually.
And you are incredibly brave for telling someone that you can't do uni , or are struggling.
It is never weak- regardless of your gender or age- to ask or tell someone you need help.
It is never weak- regardless of your gender or age- to ask or tell someone you need help.
Also , I know that some people don't want to say anything about how they feel because of how positive everybody else's experiences seem - but remember not all is as it seems.
You can never truly know what is going through somebody else's head - and thousands leave university every year for a variety of reasons- so you will not be alone.
You can never truly know what is going through somebody else's head - and thousands leave university every year for a variety of reasons- so you will not be alone.
Another thing that I would like to point out is that these suicides really could be anyone– regardless of their previous history with things such as mental illness. Because uni is tough , really tough actually and it can completely warp somebody's perspective. So be aware.
A girl on the program raised the question of how do you know when someone has gone from sad and stressed to depressed and suicidal ; to be honest- it’s a hard thing to know.
Good indicators are usually when attendance drops and people can’t seem to get out of bed , or cry or snap at people at the slightest thing.
But if you suspect that somebody is unhappy, oven in small ways, just try talking to them , asking them questions and giving them the opportunity to explain their thoughts and feelings. Don't try and advise them to stay , or leave as this might just stress them out further. J
ust advise them to speak to other people like parents or the campus on-site counselling team - and never be afraid to contact the police or their parents if you think that they are truly at risk of harming themselves.
A girl on the program raised the question of how do you know when someone has gone from sad and stressed to depressed and suicidal ; to be honest- it’s a hard thing to know.
Good indicators are usually when attendance drops and people can’t seem to get out of bed , or cry or snap at people at the slightest thing.
But if you suspect that somebody is unhappy, oven in small ways, just try talking to them , asking them questions and giving them the opportunity to explain their thoughts and feelings. Don't try and advise them to stay , or leave as this might just stress them out further. J
ust advise them to speak to other people like parents or the campus on-site counselling team - and never be afraid to contact the police or their parents if you think that they are truly at risk of harming themselves.
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